February 25, 2016

getting out of dodge

Its been a busy week around here! I started back up my nanny gig that I got last fall so a couple days a week I'm busy with twin newborns and a 2 year old! I assist the mom, I'm rarely alone with the girls but when I am, wowza! Not enough hands! Props to all the parents of multiple's, that's no joke! Whew!

Today the 3 of us are headed to Waco and we all can't wait! Its been a long time since Adam and B have been back so everyone is anxiously awaiting our flight tonight! Its going to be a busy whirlwind of a trip like always, but its always good for the soul too. Today I'm doing laundry, editing and packing so I'm gonna get after it! Hope everyone has a lovely weekend! xo

February 17, 2016

The Desert -a new perspective

I am still on the email distribution list for our church in Waco, which means I get the weekly "in the life of the church" emails that get sent out. This past week's was really poignant for me and struck me so I want to share it here because 1. I thought it was really insightful 2. It was really meaningful to me at this stage in my life 3. I think its important to share life-giving information, you never know what someone else is going through.

The most shocking thing about the Temptation of Christ is the first line: “and was led by the Spirit in the wilderness.” (Luke 4:1).  It’s shocking because we know what happens next.  As Jesus fasted, the Devil approached with three temptations: one of hunger, one of power, one of safety.  We know that Jesus is able to deny Satan and the Spirit leads Jesus out of the wilderness.  This isn’t the end of the matter, however.

            “Was led by the Spirit in the wilderness.”  It is God who leads Jesus into the desert.  Nothing good happens in the desert.  The desert’s hot, no water, no food, almost no life and the sun is unforgiving.  The sheer vastness of it drives minds mad.  Furthermore, people believed the desert was a haunt for demons (Luke 11:24; Matt 12:43).  Still, Jesus “was led by the Spirit in the wilderness.”

            Do you ever feel like you have been led into the desert?  Maybe you have.  Maybe it was God who did the leading.  After all, if God led the Lord into the desert are we, as his followers, expected to do any less?

            Thank God for the Lord then.  If God is to lead us into the desert we have the Lord as our example.  He was in constant prayer before being led into the desert, once there he fasted, and because of these his mind and spirit were completely in tune with God.  There were no distractions for Christ.  This is why he could deny the Devil.

            The Lord said “If anyone would follow me, they must first deny themselves, pick up their cross, and follow me” (Mark 8:34).  The “follow” part is wherever Jesus leads, that most certainly includes deserts.  The hope then is this: “Jesus returned to Galilee in the power of the Spirit” (Luke 4:14).  Just as God led Jesus into the desert, he led Jesus out of the desert.  The key is, as always, to keep following. Amen.    (written by Kelly Doolittle) 

I think when we go through times of "being in the desert" we don't often think it was God who brought us there, we just beg and plead with him to take us out! Right?! Its an interesting thing to sit and wrestle with, that God brought us to the hard place, the barren place, and is choosing to leave us there....for a while. Several months ago I was in a bad place, the darkest hole I've ever been in and someone said to me "He won't leave you here." In that moment I wanted so badly to believe it, that this wouldn't be my new normal but I wasn't entirely sure. You see, when you're in a dark place, and its unfamiliar territory you start to question a lot of things (including your sanity!), and what were once simple truths become big questions, its frightening. Now that I'm on the other side of that I can better understand and appreciate the words "He won't leave you here." The good news about that is, now I can tell someone else that same thing-and know that its true, and speak truth into their darkness. Good things come from pain. I was doing my Bible study homework today and the take-home was that God remembers his people. Its fitting that today I'm being reminded that God can/may be the one leading me to the desert but he won't forget me and leave me there. "Just as God led Jesus into the desert, he led Jesus out of the desert." As Kelly said above "keep following." Amen. xo

February 16, 2016


Whew, 2016 has been a doozy (understatement). Each time I think a do-over is going to happen, we get another whammy. I started feeling better a few days ago and since B had Friday off school we thought we'd do something fun and get outta dodge for the day. We woke up and started getting ready to head to Santa Barbara for the day and as we were about to leave we saw water coming from the guesthouse...ay yi yi. Needless to say, we had to sit around all day and wait for a plumber to deal with a clogged drain...plans ruined...AGAIN. So far 2016 has been one for the record books but in a baaaad way. I'm SO THANKFUL to be finally feeling better that the other stuff seems pretty small, perspective is always good, right?

Saturday B had a birthday party for a dear friend, afterward the 3 of us got in the car and drove to Big Bear where our friends invited us to join them for the weekend, that was fun! We played in the snow, ate yummy food and had a fun time being away and just relaxing and getting a breather for the first time in a while. 2016 do-over now please?!!!

The other day I was catching up with one of my best friends in Waco, we talked for about 3 hours and we were discussing the past year and a half for me and how hard its been and all that it has entailed and she asked me what God has taught me in this time, what my take-away is (if you will) on this season of life. I told her that in all my years of life, the many Bible studies I've done, the lessons I've learned, the hard things I've gone through, etc. the "theme" or the constant that I always come back to is God's faithfulness. God is faithful when I'm not, he never leaves me or forsakes me, he never gives up on me when my faith is weak, he doesn't delight in my suffering, he doesn't walk away when the going gets tough, but he also doesn't coddle and make life easy. Like any good parent, he allows me to learn from my mistakes, he doesn't shield me from hard things, and he doesn't always tell me what the "right" answer is to the question, he gives me free will and lets me decide. But also like a good parent, he is faithful and he shows up, he is comforting in hard times and he rejoices in the good times, he gives peace when nothing is peaceful, and he hurts when I hurt so I'm never alone in my suffering. I've been doing a Bible study with a few ladies the past several months and the name of the study is "Believing God," there are several points that the author of the study is trying to "beat into you" and a couple of those points are:

*God is who he says he is
*God can do what he says he can do

I think so often we doubt God when things get hard, that's our go-to rather than instantly being trusting and trusting that he will deliver us/redeem the situation. I get so mad at myself when I do this because really...I should know better. I mean, I've been a Christ follower now for greater than 30 years, and yet my faith is so quick to weaken when the going gets tough. Its been a good reminder that God is who he says he is, and he can do what he says he can do -he has that power, its not just a thing he says. :) God is faithful, no matter what is going on in your life, you are seen and cared for and not forgotten (even if it feels like it), hang in there. xo

February 10, 2016


Man, it has been a week. Last Wednesday I woke up to the most violent room spinning/vomiting I've ever experienced and I'm still not "normal." I've gone to numerous doctors and Adam and I have done some research online, I've been diagnosed with "Labrynthitis" which basically is just something that needs to heal itself over time. YUCK. I'm not nauseous anymore but I'm still dizzy and can't drive, I've hardly left the couch for 7 days now. We had to cancel our trip to Texas so that was sad, and we're pretty much just living a day at a time over here. I keep waiting for my "do over" on the whole new year thing....still waiting. :/ Thanks to everyone for your prayers, texts, emails, etc. means a lot. Here's to brighter days ahead. xo